2003-05-12 - 1:26 a.m.

Kiersten wrote this as a fake paper about "Great Expectations" for my Dickens class last quarter. It's pretty funny, so I wanted to share:

Wemmick, what a funny name. And walworth, that sounds like a department store. Maybe the "great expectations" are like the ones you get when you are going shopping and you are like "oh man, I am going to buy a bunch of neat stuff" but then you get there and the store is like overwhelming, there is just sooo much stuff. And you don’t want to buy anything anymore you just want to lie on the floor on the department store. And that is when I got arrested for "causing a scene" or some bullshit excuse the cops made up. Remember that day I didn’t go to class well I was at my fucking court date. And so I can relate to Pip and the girl and robert DeNero, even Mrs. Havisham though I certainly would never let my house get so dusty.

Back to weirdy named Wemmick. Someone just told me that Walworth is where he lives, maybe I have said too much. Maybe you know now that I have YET (implying that I WILL) to read the book. That is right Mr. Deadline, I didn’t read the book, YET. But maybe you can consider as you grade this that not all the other kids had a courtdate. And not all the other kids have kids of their own to support. I mean, I don’t have kids, I am just trying to get you to use your IMAGINATION! Remember that song. Think of how that song made you feel maybe it made you cry, or maybe it made you have expectations. Like for the future and stuff. I bet Pip had a song like that. IT probably was just like the John Lennon version but with a harpsichord. And then Charles Dickens decided to fuck everything up for pretty little boy pip. That is like what the man is doing to me. Don’t be part of the system, Sir teacher. Imagine all the people… living in harmony. The End.

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